Crimson
by explodingduck
Summary: There is only a sliver of a blood red sun left in the sky.


The sun paints his skin red. The golden and pink rays of a twilight sun travel all the hundreds and thousands and millions of miles from the shining star and land on his skin, giving it warmth, painting it. Oh, how she wishes she could capture him just as he is in this very moment, gilded and warm, unaware of her presence. But one cannot capture the colors of twilight with coal and pencil.

He is sipping on a cup of coffee and she can see the steam rise into the air from the white cup in his hand. She wonders how his kiss will taste, whether it will be dominated by the bitter taste of a triple espresso or whether it will taste like... something else entirely. Something she has yet to experience, something that she never will experience.

She wonders whether his skin is warm to the touch. He looks so warm.

The airport, in which they are, is bustling with life. She doesn't care for the people around them much; she is too focused on the man at the café table. He is alone – which is honestly not very surprising – but he wears the loneliness with dignity. Anyone sitting next to him would be out of his league: no one's skin would be as gilded and glorified when bathed in the evening sun; no one's eyes would sparkle quite the way his do. No one had ever given her this feeling of wanting to capture every single part of them on a piece of paper. Not quite this strongly, anyway.

The sound of her footsteps is lost in the sounds of voices and bags being dragged after their owners. Invisible like a ghost she walks toward where he is seated. She walks slowly, trying to swallow down the nervousness that runs through her body and up her throat. She doesn't dare imagine what his reaction will be. She is not even sure she knows him well enough anymore to correctly predict it. Finally she reaches the table. He looks up.

His poker face is good, he is Gibbs after all, but she manages to catch a flicker of surprise in the depths of his eyes. She can see the reflection of the sunset in his eyes and the effect is marvelous, beyond anything she would ever hope to be able to paint. He is too ethereal to be able to capture in any kind of way, she decides. She stands before him and finally the world she has come to know feels calm.

"Am I dreaming?" he whispers, not taking his eyes off her face. She's not sure whether the question is rethorical or if he's just speaking to himself, but she answers.

"I don't know." She smiles at him and he smiles back, a small smile accompanied by eyes of darkness and passion.

"We miss you, Kate." He says and it's the closest she has ever come to a Gibbs who feels comfortable to talk about feelings. Especially his own feelings. On the other hand, it has been a while since they last saw each other.

"May I join you?" she motions to the chair and he chuckles. She sits down, facing him. Slowly, she leans forward and touches the hand with which he is holding the coffee cup, slowly prying loose his fingers from it. She takes a sip and lets the bitter yet smooth liquid wash down her throat. She can feel his gaze on her, spreading warmth throughout her entire body.

"Gibbs," she begins, lisping slightly at the 's'. "I don't know how much time we have." She doesn't say anything else, just looks up at his face expectantly, awaiting his answer. He just smirks at her.

They both lean forward at the same time and her mind flashes back to that time when he had bought her coffee. She is surprised at how easily they fall into old routines, remembering how the other works as easily as they know how to breathe.

The sunlight warms her skin and his slight smile warms her insides. It is the first time in a long time that she has felt this content and she relishes the feeling, trying not to think of the fact that time is, and will always be, her enemy. He is close enough for her to study the lines on his face, to feel his breath against her mouth, to smell the soap he uses.

She leans forward and presses her lips against his.

Slowly, they part, her hand caressing his cheek. She leans back in the chair, leaving him stunned.

"You're cold." He states, taking her hand in between his, rubbing softly.

She blinks, "I am?"

Behind him, she suddenly spots a familiar figure walking toward them, confidently taking a seat next to her. He is chewing a chewing gum, and every other second, he blows a bubble. "Kate," he winks at her, "Looking good." His eyes travel up and down her body but she cannot feel even the slighest urge to be disgusted. She just laughs at him, leaning over and giving him a quick peck on the cheek, "Tony," she greets. His hand flies up to where her lips just touched him as if he had been burnt.

"Ow, Kate, you're cold." He makes a face, but then he smiles, eyes honest and surprisingly mature. "I knew you'd realize how much you miss me." His smile is as charming as ever, perfectly straight and white teeth glowing in the light of the soon to be sleeping sun. If he were to be painted, the painting would be quite spectacular as well.

They don't have time to say anything else before suddenly Abby, Ducky and McGee walk toward them. Abby runs ahead of them, black hair and clothes completely rejecting the glow of the sunlight, and jumps into Kate's open and waiting embrace.  
"Kate," she says breathlessly without letting go even the slightest, "Kate, Kate, Kate," she says and from above Abby's head, which is buried against her shoulder, Gibbs intense gaze is on her. Kate holds Abby and silent tears begin to roll down her cheeks.

"Abs, let her breathe," Gibbs orders with a soft voice, and Abby reluctantly lets go of Kate.

McGee is fidgeting, hands moving about the pockets and lapels of his jacket, as he smiles at her nervously. "Hi Kate," he says and she just smiles at him, widely and joyfully.

"Caitlin," Ducky greets her like an old friend and her smile grows.

"Ducky," she breathes, taking his hand as she stands up to hug him. "You look good."

"Why, thank you, dear."

They all get seated on the chairs surrounding the round table, and Kate intentionally takes the seat next to Gibbs. She scoots closer until she can feel his warmth radiating off of him. They sit in content silence as people rush by to catch flights and trains and cabs. The huge windows to the right display airplanes ready to take off, filled with men and women and breaths and laughter and fear and expectation- and a sky that is slowly growing a darker pink.

As the minutes pass, Kate's smile fades.

"I think..." she begins, "I'll have to leave soon, guys." She looks around the table at the faces of a family that was once hers. Underneath the table, Gibbs takes her hand. She knew from the beginning that time was not on her side. Suddenly it dawns on her that when the sun is entirely hidden behind the horizon, when the pink rays of sun that looks so good when on him, when it comes to an end, so will their time, they little they have, together. She doesn't know how she can know this, but she is sure of it, she knows that when darkness falls upon them... they'll lose her forever. More importantly, she will lose them.

"So..." Tony suddenly says and all eyes are on him. "What's it like, Kate?" he flashes her a smile and blows a bubble, chewing with his mouth open. "...Afterlife, I mean."

"Oh, wouldn't you like to know," she responds quickly and they all chuckle. She feels the desperation begin to fill her up. It physichally hurts inside her chest. Oh God, she had missed them. So damn much.

After the laughter has subsided Tony opens his mouth again, "But... seriously." and his eyes are serious and mature and so unlike the Tony she knew that it frightens her a little.

"I can't tell you, Tony." That closes the discussion. She doesn't want to tell him. She can't.

The sun becomes weaker and weaker, and Kate's eyes lock with Gibbs. He doesn't say anything, no one does. They're letting the feeling of... home speak for itself. The silence is not awkward, it is calm and loving. And Kate feels so grateful.

As the lights are turned on – yet another sign that night is approaching - a shadow appears a few tables away. It is not so much a shadow as it is a woman with dark hair and dark eyes and a dark coat. She is petite, the same height as Kate, and Kate immediately knows who those dark eyes belong to. And Kate looks into those eyes and she knows that before the woman has approached the table, she herself will be gone. Even if this moment that they are sharing is beyond anything she could have hoped for, even this, even this warm love has its limits, and the limit must be meeting a person you have never in your life encountered. Kate's heart feels as if it has dropped down into her stomach, joining the espresso.

The woman is not moving, not yet, and Kate tears her eyes away from the woman, looking around the table. The others haven't noticed her yet and Kate hesitates. Should she... say something? She doesn't panic but she feels her heart beat speed up. And when Gibbs, who is the only one at the table aside from Kate who actually has a chance of seeing the woman from where he is sitting, finally sees her and all faces immediately turn toward Ziva David. Kate stands up.

Abby notices, "Kate?"

Kate doesn't answer as she watches their faces turn from left to right, from woman to woman, from living to dead. And slowly, slowly it dawns upon them that there are only five chairs. Before anyone can say anything, Kate puts her finger to her lips, shushing them.

"Don't say anything," she pleads. There is only a sliver of a blood red sun left in the sky.

Kate puts her hand against her heart, feeling it beat, feeling the life in her veins. She wonders if it is an illusion. "Keep me," she says and looks down at the hand that is covering her heart. "In here."

She takes a few steps back, trying to ignore the heartbroken expressions on their faces.

"I'm not gone. As long as you keep me there, okay?" she tries to reassure them, wondering whether she's just lying to comfort herself, wondering whether it is all just a lie, an illusion, a dream built upon nothing but her own longing.

When Ziva takes one step forward, Kate steps backwards, and as the last remaining rays of the crimson sun of twilight begin to fade, she runs and she runs and she runs. She does not look back.

Ziva David sits down on the chair, feeling the warmth of another person's body having occupied it seconds before.

Caitlin Todd runs and runs... and runs out of the airport and into green fields that softly embrace her.

The sun has gone to sleep.

She is gone.

Forever.


End file.
